I spoke to Carrie recently about my concern that Nutty Men are very close to outnumbering Nutty Women. I am not counting significant others at this point because we would have lost this battle a long time ago. With 4 nutty husbands and 3 male nutlettes, we are in a crisis, ladies. Seriously. So with Sarah's #2 quickly approaching, we have little time left to perform any and all rituals to force a female nutlette out of her belly.
Strategy #1 - Wear more skirts and frilly things.
I feel that by projecting a more feminine aura across the globe, we could make the lil' one in Sarah's belly understand that being a girl can be fun, flirty and stylish.
Strategy #2 - Cheer for the women!
Stop watching male sports and tune in to ESPN4829423874 to watch the women strut their stuff. I have recently seen some great bowlers and pool sharks who are much cuter than the old vest wearing types to which we have become accustomed. If a sport is coed, feel free to tune in as long as you are cheering for Danica or Michelle. Unfortunately, we will have to wait a while to see the WNBA.
Strategy #3 - Stop doing math.
As we all know, women are bad at math, so stop doing it. By straining your brain to perform such difficult feats, you will send a bad female vibe to de Rivaz #2. Just use your calculator, ladies.
I am open to any other strategies that are proposed, so please, let's work together here.
*Disclaimer: We will love nutlette #4 if he is a boy just as much as we will if she is a girl...but WOE to the male nutlette #5.
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3 comments:
Do pets count? Ann, Annelise, and I all have female dogs (nutty "bitches" to be precise). Do we have to count Cow?
I say we start a campaign to adopt female pets, children, and cars (Carrie is helping in this last regard) to rectify this potential imbalance.
Intuition tells me we don't have anything to worry about with de Rivaz #2 but I still think female pets are a good protective strategy.
Oh, and if it helps, I will be wearing skirts every day for a year...
Well, I can speak for myself, I will love this nutlette 100% - boy or girl - but I think Luke has his heart set on wooing a little Miss De Rivaz. He's already told Nora across the street (an older woman, by the way - by four whole months) that she is second in line, so she needs to cool it.
And by the way, how do I create a new post?
Oh, and I have updated my user profile if anyone cares to take a look.
Love to all,
JBR
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